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Connecting the Dots

Often times we go through life and wonder

--why am I doing this?--

I know it’s what I am supposed to be doing, but I have no idea why I’m doing it.

January 2017: I felt stuck, like I was in a rut. I felt like spiritually I wasn’t progressing at all. I was doing all those things we are told to do as members of the church to help us progress: reading my scriptures every day, going to church, praying... It didn't help. A couple of months went by and I was still feeling this way-- I just didn’t know what to do. So I asked my dad to give me a priesthood blessing. I remember when he was done giving me the blessing I felt so much peace. I knew that I just needed to keep doing what I was doing and that the best was yet to come.


A Sunday on La Grande Jatte, 1884, Georges Seurat

This same month Elder Uchtdorft gave a talk at a worldwide devotional about looking back and seeing the dots in your life connect (which has totally helped me so much and I highly recommend it).

He said,

Sometimes our lives are like neo- impressionistic art. The dots of color that make up the moments and events of our days can appear unconnected and chaotic at times. We can’t see any order to them. We can’t imagine that they have a purpose at all. However, when we step back and take an eternal perspective, when we look at our lives in the frame of the gospel of Jesus Christ, we can begin to see how the various dots in our lives interconnect. We may not be able to see the entire picture just yet, but we see enough to trust that there is a beautiful grand design.


Connecting the dots.

As I've gone through life, I've had times when trusting Heavenly Father and His plan is SO easy, because I'm seeing dots connect and seeing how my prayers are answered. However, there have also been times when trusting God is SO hard for me and I think part of the reason is because I get too worried about the why, more specifically, the "why me?"

Uchtdorf went on to say,

Your 'small and simple' sacrifices are the dots of daily living that make up the masterpiece painting of your life. You may not see how the dots connect now and you don’t need to yet. Simply have faith enough for the moment you are living in now. Trust in God, and ‘out of small things [will come] that which is great.


A Sunday on the La Grande Jatte, 1884, Georges Seurat


Trusting in the Lord is hard.Sometimes I even ask myself if I even have enough faith to trust Him and trust that He will guide my path. When I have these moments of needing to trust Heavenly Father, I remind myself of Nephi and when he went back to get the plates, “And I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do. Nevertheless, I went forth” ( 1 Nephi 4: 6-7). The two key parts in that scripture that help me are: that he went forth and therefore was led by the spirit.

June 2017: I talked to my sister-in-law about life.

She invited me to come up and stay with her and my brother for a while. I told her I’d think about it. And I did, lots. But it didn't seem possible to me. How could I take time off work? I kept praying about it and asking Heavenly Father if I was meant to go, would He help make it possible? I talked to my parents about it and told them I wanted to go, I felt like I needed to go. My parents discussed it and felt it was something I needed to do too. Let’s just say Heavenly Father has me working full-time for my dad for a reason.

When my dad gave me that blessing in January, I felt the impression that I needed to go through the temple for myself and make covenants with my Heavenly Father. I felt it was what I needed next in my life-- to continue on my path of eternal progression. I was nervous, for who knows what reason, but excited for this next step in my life. I thought about it often and started to prepare, but then I just kept putting it off and coming up with excuses. Let’s just say Satan is really good at getting me to think that I wasn't worthy of such blessings but he’s wrong because I AM WORTHY of such blessings.

Meridian Idaho Temple, Alan Fullmer

October 2017: I knew what I needed to do.

I went up to Idaho. While I was there, the Meridian Temple was having its open house. I ended up going on 3 separate occasions. Once with my sister-in-law’s parents when they were visiting, once with my parents when they were visiting, and once with the Boise State Institute. Each time it hit me more and more that I needed to stop putting off going to the temple. I had already known it was what I needed to do next. I mean I’m pretty sure I took temple prep a total of like 4 times over the last few years.

November 2017: The night before I came home,

I remember kneeling beside my bed, praying to Heavenly Father. My eyes filled with tears. Most of the prayer I just sat there because I couldn’t get the words out. I remember being overcome with gratitude for the opportunity I had to be in Idaho for 6 weeks. In this cluster of dots I had grown spiritually; I had made awesome friends, grown closer to my brother, sister-in-law, and niece. But most importantly I was made aware of how much my Father in Heaven and my Savior love me, I felt that love the whole time I was there. It was exactly what I needed at that time. I needed to feel my Father’s and Savior’s love for me, telling me that they are on my side and that they are connecting my dots.

When I came back from Idaho, I talked with my Bishop and told him after tax season I want to go through the temple. Why after tax season? My brother in Idaho is an accountant and I wanted him to be there. I also needed to wait for my sister-in-law, a professor, to be done with school.


May 18, 2018 will forever hold a special place in my heart. That was the day I covenanted with the Lord that I choose Him and will forever choose Him. I remember the whole night I was so overwhelmed with love. Love for my Heavenly Father and Savior. Love for my family and close friends that were there to support me. But most importantly I was overwhelmed with the love that they all have for me.

Steve Jobs said, “You can’t connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.” I don’t know what my future has in store for me; but I do know that by choosing Christ and following God’s Will, my dots will connect. They already are connecting. But one day, when I get to see Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ face to face and reflect on my life with them I will see the beautiful picture that I created, with Their help. I will see what dots made up all the parts of my life. -Missy

P.S. I linked the talk for you to read or watch it ;)


https://www.lds.org/broadcasts/article/worldwide-devotionals/2018/01/the-adventure-of-mortality?lang=eng



 
 
 

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